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WILD~WIERD~WACKY


    The following links are all about Wild,Wierd,Wacky things about Georgia.






    Ghost Train
    Submitted by Goldie Meow



    The following articles have had names witheld.
    (for obvious reasons)




    Cobb County Ga.
    You're a young lady working in a convenience
    store when a thug with a cloth over his face enters and pulls a gun.Suddenly you recognize the stick-up artist--it's your DAD!!!
    That's what happened recently to a very
    suprised clerk working in a Cobb County, Ga. convenience store.
    The honest woman identified the alleged robber,
    (name witheld) 41, for stunned police.
    Hi Pop!! By Pop!!



    Atlanta Ga.
    Bad News for Georgia Family who use
    mail-order catalogs for toilet paper!!
    The fact that more and more mail-order firms
    are going out of business comes as quite a blow to the (name witheld)family-because the pages of the catalogs are their sole source of toilet paper!!
    "They're sending us up the creek without a
    paddle,that's for sure,"(name witheld),39 told reporters who visited the family's farm west of here.
    "We've relied on those catalogs all our lives
    and now we're in a fix".
    "You might think we're being silly,but when it
    comes to stock for the outhouse,those catalogs really are in a class by themselves,"said (name withheld),33.
    "The pages have a special look and feel that
    nobody can duplicate".
    "Toilet paper might be soft,but it can't hold a
    candle to the pages of a good mail-order catalog." "I'd know the difference blindfolded".
    As soon as the (name witheld) heard that
    mail-order firms were closing,they sprang into action,driving to not one but three different showrooms in the Atlanta area-and stocking up on 53 leftover catalogs.
    "We go through 20 to 25 a year with guests and
    all,and we figure that the 53 we were able to get will last two years at least. After that,we'll just have to do the best we can.The worst thing about this is that it's the end of a long tradition.My parents and grandparents used mail-order catalogs before I did and it's a habit I've tried to pass along to my son.He's 9 now and by the time he's 11,all our catalogs will be gone forever".
    Talk about Family Tradition!!!!




    Who cares about crime, pollution and taxes when
    there are important issues like grocery bags to worry about?
    Georgia State Rep. Dorthy Pelote is outraged
    that supermarket employees sometimes --gasp!--lick their fingers to open bags, so she is calling for a device at all bagging stations to help dampen digits.
    It's the healthy thing to do, she says. A state
    health official agrees. Cuts down on germs, don'tcha know.
    Thank heaven the good folks of Georgia have
    Pelote on the job watching out for their health.



    OUTRAGED GEORGIA'S NOT TO FOND OF FONDA

    Outspoken actress Jane Fonda has put her foot
    in it again--this time likening her adopted home state of Georgia to a Third World country where children are dying of hunger on the streets.
    Fonda, who lives in a plush Atlanta penthouse
    with billionaire husband Ted Turner, made her boo-boo at a U.N. hearing on overpopulation.
    "In the northern part of Georgia children are
    starving to death. People live in tar-paper shacks with no indoor plumbing and so forth," Fonda said.
    "It's what makes working in Georgia very
    interesting because we are, in some ways, like some developing countries."
    Jane also said,"Georgia has one of the lowest
    rates of adults that have graduated from high school."
    The angry reaction of state leaders including an
    outraged Gov. Zell Miller, forced Fonda--whose husband has extensive business interest in the state including his CNN headquarters-- to apoligize for her remarks.
    "I was wrong. I should not have said what I
    said. My comments were inaccurate and ill-advised," Fonda said.
    Do you think she would like to join our club..HAHAHAHA


    Columbus, Ga.
    Mark Stevels, 6, may be a little shaver--but
    he's already working as a hairstylist.
    The scissor-toting tot can shampoo a client,
    snip out a high-fashion "do" and blow dry a head of hair as well as any pro four times his age. The boy has five regular customers in his grandpa's shop and gets loads of compliments on his work.
    Little Mark reports to his granddad's salon
    every afternoon and puts in three hours work before his mom takes him home for dinner at night. He greets customers, washes their hair and seats them in the barber chair for his grandfather to work on.
    Once a week or so, one of his own customers
    comes in and the first grader rolls up his sleeves and gets to work. He climbs up on a stool for a better view of his client, the scissors snip and the clippers whir -- and presto! A perfect haircut.
    Mark doesn't have a license yet, so he can't charge for the haircuts. But he hopes , one day, to have his own swank haircutting salon.


    DON'T LISTEN TO HIM -- HE WAS MY ACCOMPLICE!

    An man burst into a Milledgeville, Georgia
    convenience store, announced a robbery, and began grabbing everything he could get his hands on. Unable to hold any more in his arms, the thief told the clerk to get him some boxes. After filling the boxes, the holdup man ordered the clerk to help him carry the loot home.
    When the pair arrived at the thief's house a
    short distance away, he told the clerk "Okay, you go back to the store now." The clerk returned to the store, called police, and took them straight back to the house where they arrested the suspect.


    LIKE THE REALTORS SAY: LOCATION IS EVERYTHING

    A thief in Forsyth, Georgia heaved a brick
    through the window of a clothing store and grabbed $600 worth of designer shirts.
    What Mr. Smash-And-Grab apparently didn't
    know was that the store was two doors down from a law enforcement supply store, where a group of off-duty cops were finishing a hand-to-hand combat class. They were on the scene in seconds.
    As the suspect screamed "let go of me!" a pair
    of cops held him down while another officer returned to the store and brought back a pair of handcuffs.
    Said one officer: "I think I would have picked
    a better place to break in than next door to a jujitsu training class." After confessing to the robbery -- which was also captured on video -- the suspect turned to one of the officers and said "Damn, that was stupid.


    MAUSOLEUM OWNERS RENTING EMPTY TOMBS
    TO LOW-INCOME

    Mausleum living has caught on here and in other
    major cities, including Boston, New York, Chicago, Los Angeles and Dallas.
    "Many landlords won't rent to people with
    children",said Greg Diebreck of Atlanta, who rents his family mausoleum to a couple with a 5-year old son.
    "They had hit some hard times financially and
    weren't able to put together enough money for the security deposit and two months' rent most apartments require. I made them a deal they couldn't get anywhere else."
    Micheal and Andrea Daban and their 5-year old
    son Paul say they are happy to live in Diebreck's oversized crypt for $100 a month.
    "It's better than being out on the street",
    Andrea pointed out.


    GOOD LUCK -- YOU CRAZY KIDS!

    A Valdosta, Georgia man told sheriff's deputies
    he was beaten up by his wife -- on their wedding day.
    The man said his wife had attacked him after he
    tried to keep her from driving under the influence after their wedding reception. Investigating officers say the man had four bite marks on his arm, cuts on his face and scalp, and a black eye. No charges were filed.


    I HEARD THE GEORGIA DAWGS WERE TOUGH, BUT...

    A Cordelle, Georgia policeman stopped a vehicle
    for weaving on the roadway. The driver gave the officer permission to search the car, but during the search, the man fled the scene. The suspect thought he had gotten away, until a small black-and-white dog started chasing him.
    The man ran through some bushes and jumped
    over a fence to escape the dog, and found himself in a pen with a large Rotweiller. Narrowly escaping from the second dog, the man resumed his running, but was attacked again, by what he described as a "big old brown dog."
    Police arrested the hapless fugitive and
    charged him with illegal possession of a firearm, driving with a revoked license, and obstruction of an officer.

    How bout them Dawgs!!!!


    JERRY SPRINGER'S PROBABLY ALREADY TRYING TO BOOK THIS BUNCH

    Americus, Georgia police were called to the
    scene of a domestic disturbance. They found a 22-year-old man who says he became upset when his 61-year-old grandmother wouldn't buy him car insurance. The man had expressed his anger by pulling down his pants and shaking his private parts at her. Granny responded by punching the man in the mouth and choking him.
    The man says that during the dispute, his
    22-year-old aunt also struck him. The man, the grandmother, and the aunt were all arrested and charged with disorderly conduct.


    BET HE HAS TROUBLE FINDING THE TV REMOTE TOO

    A Conyers, Georgia man who bought a used
    Mercedes convertible then reported it stolen found out that the car was equipped with one extra accessory he didn't know about: a LoJack anti-theft tracking device.
    When police activated the device...they were
    able to quickly track the car down: it was parked in the man's basement...along with 3 other cars that had recently been reported stolen.


    Rockford -- A TV news crew is doing a live interview with a guy, going on-and-on about under- aged drinkers from his perch on a stool at a local watering hole. Well, one of the people watching the news that night was a police detective that thought this guy looked very familiar. Sure enough, it was the same guy wanted for murder in Georgia. He was busted.


    PENIS CENSORSHIP RAMPANT IN MEDIA

    ATLANTA (Wireless Flash)
    A medical reporter at the Atlanta Journal &
    Constitution says it's time for the media to grow up when it comes to stories about the male sexual organ.
    Reporter Diane Lore says many newspaper and
    magazine editors need to get over their fears about using the word "penis" or printing realistic diagrams of the male organ which are needed to educate readers about male health problems.
    Lore says the hullabaloo over Viagra and
    the increased interest in prostate cancer demands that medical reporters stop mincing words and censoring pictures when talking about the penis.
    Most publications reporting on Viagra
    tried to explain how the drug works by using bizarre representations for the penis including arrows, lightning bolts or even a happy face.
    Lore says that only leads to confusion because
    men need to see a realistic drawing of the penis to really understand how Viagra works. In her words, "...the more honest newspapers get, the better we get."
    CONTACT: Diane Lore, ****; Atlanta, GA; (404) ***-****


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